Archive for August 25th, 2013

Taking Aim

It seems to me that from the time they are two or three years old, boys and men are involved in participatory sports.  Whether it’s basketball, football, hockey, baseball, soccer, lacrosse, darts, ping-pong, foosball, golf, tennis, or Angry Birds, they spend a huge chunk of time practicing their aim and coordination.

So why, oh why, is it so hard for boys to aim properly when they use a toilet?  (Many wives insist it does not get better when they reach adulthood.)

Now that my eight grandsons have left Maine and returned to their homes, my bathroom no longer smells like pee.  Imagine, if you will, an entire week of using the bathroom, and every single time I sat down on the seat, it was wet.

After my grandkids left, I was very busy.

Upon their departure, I did eleven loads of laundry, which included but was not limited to 9 beach towels, 3 regular towels, 1 duvet cover, 1 futon cover, 5 scatter rugs, 3 sleeping bags, 11 pillowcases, 9 sheets, and 5 blankets.

Every single surface throughout my house was sticky from candy, Popsicles, s’mores residue, squashed blueberries, mashed cake and cookie crumbs, congealed Wacky Mac cheese sauce and gummy macaroni, spilled cereal and milk, and who knows what else.

But the first thing I did was scrub the bathroom.  It took some effort, but I’m happy to report it no longer reeks like a porta-potty.

Which is not to say we didn’t have fun.  Fishing, swimming, kayaking, hiking, camping , campfires and s’mores – it was all about making memories.  It was a huge success; and well worth it.

. . . But the bathroom . . . !


The Scream by Edvard Munch